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6 February 2009 / April

Superior

I had my very last Festival today.

It was weird how completely relaxed I was, actually, considering the pressure of straight Superior ratings behind me, reminding me how much I didn’t want to be the person who got Superiors– until the end.  But I didn’t remember that when I was playing.

I arrived early at IC and went downstairs to practice, but couldn’t think of anything I needed to do.  If it wasn’t right now, it wouldn’t be right ever, and practicing it more at this point would only make it worse.  So I played the bizarre modern piece I’ll be joining the IHS band for, sightread a little Dumky, on a whim played through the Brahms romance I performed last week.  (Wow, that feels like ages ago.  It’s been a long week.)

Then I went upstairs to play my Prokofiev concerto for the judge and completely messed up.

As in I totally skipped about 8 measures, realized this, stopped playing, tried to start again, couldn’t really, and just decided to wait for the orchestral interlude because it was coming up soon anyway.  It was arguably a disaster.  But I’m just thankful I didn’t say anything, like “sorry,” because I’ve gotten into a bad bad bad habit of doing that.

I’m also thankful that I played the correct last note, which hasn’t exactly been 100% accurate in previous run-throughs.  And I really enjoyed playing on that piano.  It was ridiculously and satisfyingly loud.

So I’ve received my last Superior rating (evidently the only one doled out today).  It feels so final.  I feel like I should be all nostalgic but I don’t really have much to say.  I guess it’s just the first of a large number of things that have to change as I gradually transition to college.

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