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18 April 2008 / April

America would be a better place today if we just kept those toddlers out of the White House

Confirm my sanity and tell me this sentence is totally ambiguous to you too:

He turned seventy weeks after taking office and was the oldest man ever to serve as president.

I had to stare at it in bemusement for a while before it would parse right. Because I know Reagan was not a year and a few months old when he became president.

While I’m thinking about it, I might as well mention that Hamilton Fish is THE FUNNIEST NAME I HAVE EVER ENCOUNTERED, bar none*.

Oh, but look at him– he’s such a dour old man! How is someone named Hamilton Fish a dour old man? Doesn’t he get a kick out of signing checks, or seeing his name in the paper as “Secretary of State Fish”? If I were him, I would wake up every single morning and think “Holy shit, MY NAME IS HAMILTON FISH.” And the thought would bring me endless joy.

… And now I shall return to my history homework.

*Only because I haven’t encountered anyone named Muffin yet.

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2 Comments

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  1. Kari / Apr 19 2008 10:57 pm

    “How is someone named Hamilton Fish a dour old man? Doesn’t he get a kick out of signing checks, or seeing his name in the paper as “Secretary of State Fish”? If I were him, I would wake up every single morning and think “Holy shit, MY NAME IS HAMILTON FISH.” And the thought would bring me endless joy.”

    Okay. Yes, I’m a completely straight female and completely involved, but…
    Marry me? Please?

  2. April / Apr 20 2008 10:18 am

    I’m a completely straight female though not completely involved, but…
    Yes.

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